Dear Dr. Hottie,
Oh, hmm, I guess I’ve never addressed you that way in the 17 years you’ve been treating me, hey. Well Dr. Endocrinologist, this week is Diabetes Blog Week, and the first of the list of blog topics for the week is what I would like to share with you (or not) if there were no barriers, judgements, etc. standing in the way. And I suppose this topic was meant for things like blood sugar control, difficulties and or accomplishments with every day diabetes life, but the thing is, I’ve never really held back when talking to you about my diabetes – and other things!
I’ve shared with you my obsessiveness with BG perfection, so much so, I suffer more lows than I’d like. I’ve told you about how the stress of exams often shoots my blood sugars into oblivion. I’ve gushed about my conquering of this disease with every running stride I make. I’ve chastised you countless times about your preferred method of contact via facsimile (seriously, faxes are so 1995!!!) and congratulated you when you finally did make the step towards email. That wasn’t so hard was it?
But, Dr. Hottie, I’ve never told you about how when I first met you as a young 18-year-old, my moms had to practically wipe the drool from my chin, how I barely heard a word you said, just the lilt of your sweet American accent, how that dorky bow tie of yours gets my heart skipping a beat every time I see it, how I dream of that twice a visit firm, silky handshake for months before each appointment and how I am loathe to wash my hands after, or how I practically stop breathing every time your hands
caress inspect my thyroid in my neck, and when I finally started taking care of myself and was told I only needed to come see you once a year, not twice, how disappointed and heartbroken I truly was. And now, how proud and excited I get when you point out how excellent I am with my diabetes, how my hgA1c numbers are numbers to grow old with, how I am a standout patient of yours. Sigh.
The crush has been going strong for 18 years, dear doctor, and I don’t see it diminishing anytime soon! But I also don’t see myself coming clean with it anytime soon, so maybe I’ll have better luck opening up about the other “secret” I’ve been keeping from you – my lancet changing failings; I can’t remember the last time I changed that… oops! Nah, why would I waste time doing that when I could just keep gazing dreamily into your super intelligent hazelnut eyes, er, I mean, discuss serious diabetes things 😉
* This week is the fourth annual Diabetes Blog Week where bloggers in the diabetes community post on a set topic each day of the week. This is my first time participating, and while I can’t promise I’ll post every day, I will try. Happy reading! *