Tag Archives: ultrasound

‘HOLY COW… there’s a baby in there’

My goodness my “little” five-pounder is turning heads these days!


Even the shadows are talking.

I had an ultrasound done yesterday to measure the size of thumb-sucking alien baby and pretty much the whole time the perinatologist kept saying Yep, that’s a big one.” She did multiple measurements seemingly to will TSAB to a smaller size (they use an equation that measures the circumference of the head, the cut of mama’s belly and something else to figure out the size) but finally had to concede that I’ve got a five-pounder in my belly, which falls in the 93rd percentile of huge! (Really hoping that large head equates to a super-large, super-smart brain ;))

But given the numerous exclamations and proclamations regarding the size of my belly these days, you’d think I was carrying a 20-pounder in there!

Now, there have been some amazing people (friends, acquaintances, and even a few strangers) who’ve quipped at the smallness of my belly, and let me just say, if we weren’t already bffs, I assure you we are now! But more so than not, it’s those others whose comments haunt my daily endeavors:

“Wow, you’re quite large for where you are!”
“That’s not a subtle pregnancy is it?!?”
“That baby looks ready to pop!”
“Must be any day now.”
“Packing a large load there, hey.”
“Are you sure there’s not twins in there?”
“My gawd, that doesn’t even look real!”


Yep, it’s come to this, my baby the serving table 😀

It’s not the first time I’ve encountered such comments throughout this pregnancy… I have been sporting a preggers paunch for quite some time. And yet, every time I’m faced with these types of comments, it’s like I lose the ability to use my friggin’ tongue. Because if I were on the ball, that pharmacist, that barista, that old lady walking the trail, and that half-naked, hairy, old man sitting at the bus stop would have heard something along the lines of: “In 2 months time, this belly will be gone, but in 2 months time, that ugly face of yours will still be just as ugly as it today. Shame.”
Oh. Snap.

I can take a joke, sure I can, in fact, I’m usually the butt of my own jokes, and almost always the easy target for my brothers, but after 8 months of an ever-changing, hormonal body, 5 months of people remarking on the rotund size of my belly, one of them even having the gall to call me Tubs – and 90 per cent of whom are strangers – I’m losing my patience. I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to walk up to a non-pregnant person and greet them as Shamu,” so why is it okay for them to walk up to me and pretty much do the same?

SUCK LEMONS JERK FACES!

Now, that all being said, when my soon-to-be brother-in-law, who I haven’t seen in about a month and a half, walks into a room, spots my belly, points at it with his mouth agape and shouts: “HOLY COW… there’s a baby in there!” he can be forgiven. I know I’m sounding hypocritical, but first of all, this guy is family, that’s what they do; second of all, he is notorious for sticking his foot in his mouth and bringing a laugh to everyone else’s in the process; and third, I know I could kick his ass in a running race – even in my 32-week pregnant state! Who’s laughing now Patty Pat Pat? Bahahahhahahaa 😛

19 weeks: The stubborn gene

The things I learned about thumb-sucking alien baby today:

  • It’s stubborn.
  • It has a beautiful spine.
  • It may have evil tendencies.
  • It’s going to be a future cyclist.
  • And it moves… thank goodness!

Today was my 18-20 week ultrasound and initially I thought I’d be going it alone as the lab is 45 minutes from Big Ring’s work. But that dear husband of mine caught the trepidation in my voice and announced a couple days ago that he’d be accompanying me.

Normally this is supposed to be an exciting, glorious time right. But for me, I’d kind of been fretting about it. See, I’ve been freaking out lately that I haven’t yet felt any kind of alien baby movement. And rightfully so! You wouldn’t believe how many people in the last three weeks (doctors, nurses, friends, co-workers, strangers) have asked if I’ve felt anything. Uhm, no. (And it’s not like I know what I’m supposed to be feeling!) So then, me being me, I started thinking something was wrong. Totally logical.

As far as I could tell I don’t think anything medical was wrong (aside from only seeing one leg) but my gawd, this kid is already showing my stubborn tendencies. It was laying on its belly, showing off its fully intact spine, and did not want to be disturbed. The lab tech tried moving me from one side to another, she put pressure down on the scopey thing rubbing cold gel all over my belly, but the kid, it was not budging. Finally, only after the tech had me pace for like five minutes, did alien baby change position.

And it was in that moment I realized we may have an evil one on our hands. Lying on its back, one side profile to us, with its tiny little hands out in front of it (all digits intact) it moved its fingers in rapid succession seemingly plotting evil. I could almost hear the “Mwahahahaha” coming out of it 😀


Caught mid evil plot.

But the best part was most definitely Big Ring’s reaction. When thumb-sucking alien baby was showing off its spine, we got a good glimpse of one of its legs (only one mind you) and my gawd it was a long one. “That’s a future cyclist!” Big Ring announced, big smile on his face, pride in his voice.


And this is what happens when Big Ring starts dreaming about a future cyclist… online shopping 😀